• Damnit, I just posted to explain and the forum done its thing about un-filled fields.

    Alright, let me try to type this up again!

    As most of you have noticed, there has been a lack of support and updates this year for Oberin.  I do have a half update completed with a lot of graphics that Hayate had supplied me with last year.  That master blacksmith hammer?  Well, it has a use in this update, and the use is to craft beauty.  I don't want to spoil it too much.

    For the past couple years, a few of you have known that i was suffering from depression and some health issues.  This allowed me to have a lot of time to work on the computer with personal projects and Oberin.  I decided coming into 2016 that enough was enough and I would not stop let me health stop me from reaching my goal of becoming my own boss and running my own business.

    A lot of time this year has gone into projects that I thought may make me a fair income, but after getting halfway through them, I doubted my projects and laid them aside.  This tends to happen a lot since childhood, the self doubt and ability.  

    This led me to hearing about quite a good opportunity around 3 months ago, so I began investing small amounts here and there for training and travel, around 2 months past and the self doubt once again kicked in, but, I am very stringent with money (Considering I was only getting enough for food and bills each week, and i think i get it from my grandmother.) so I decided that i had invested too much money at that point to turn back.  Another couple of thousand dollars later, it kicked in again, but, the amount i invested was too much for me to turn back.  Eventually things just kept going foward to the point of me spending 20k of the families money, who was generous enough to lend to me in this venture.  Blimmy, too late to turn back now, thats for sure.

    What is this opportunity?  NGA Fibre Technician.  Currently in New Zealand there is a massive roll-out project, we are trying to connect the entire country to Optical Fibre.  Massive project with quite a lengthly life to the project.  The pay is good and as long as we work hard, fast and up to quality, the more jobs we complete, the more money we get paid.  Evemtually I will be looking at getting a replacement for myself and taking on a few more people.  This will allow me to move back to the IT sector with pay and in turn will allow me to work on Oberin as a top priority.

    Any questions?  Fire away.

    Wanted to live in New Zealand for some time now?  I might actually be able to hire you and help get you a work Visa.

    Anywho, this has been the reason for my absence in game.  I have not given up on Oberin, it has been what has driven me to do this so I can actually afford to live while working on it.

    P.S.S  For everyone I have been trying to help get back on with Sheepshaver and VMWare, please try to be patient with me,  for the past 3 months I have had so much lack of time, that a lot of things that need to be done around the house have not yet been completed.  Infact, I have been busy from the time i wake up at 6am through to around 8pm, when i usually commer out from exhaustion then wake up the next day to start all over again.  Hopefully this doesn't carry on when the work begins, its just the primary stuff that needs t be completed to begin work that has been that tedious.

    P.S.S.S  If anyone is interested, once I get my van fully kitted out in the wekend, I can put a photo up here of what 80k looks like in this industry.

    P.S.S.S.S The original post was much better laid out and not so over the place.

  • I just logged in to see what's up and saw this post.
    Depression sucks and I'm glad you're tanking through it. I almost killed myself last year, and I know how bad that self doubt is. Keep going, and good luck with your job!

  • HI Ariki,

    Im sorry to hear about the difficulties you have been working through. Depression is a rough hand to be dealt, good on you for fighting on through it.

    Here in Aus getting on a government contract for infrastructure work is considered a pretty solid earner, I hope it proves the same for you over the pond.

    Whilst I have no plans to move to NZ any time soon I, and im sure the rest of the community, is ready to help in any way we can. smile

    P.S. I'd be interested in seeing the van all kitted up.

  • Ariki, thank you for being so open and frank with us - you have the support of our little community and I am sure people respect and love you all the more for it. You are not alone in matters of depression - it is an ugly beast to fight and come become a vicious circle but, as somebody has said before me and to me, even the longest night must come to an end.

    Sorry to hear Neblin having had issues too. Hope they are resolved.

  • Hi Ariki,

    I can certainly relate to dealing with serious health issues, one thing that took me for ever to understand is to be patient and not be so hard with myself, it will take the time it takes to get back on your feet, it's ok to take a step back in order to take a step forward later on, be kind with yourself, take it one day at a time, one hour at a time or a minute at a time if your must, keep fighting, keep moving forward, but do it with baby steps, you will eventually see the light of day.

    Ariki, Neblin, Rygarth, Fuoco, and to all other who have been fighting illness,

    Do not let the judgments of others or the judgments of society pull your down, we live in a disconnected world, surrounded by fake people who have the attention spam of a gold fish (about one second), most people live for the next instant gratifications, that's not real, head toward the opposite, keep it simple, keep your circle small, surround yourself with real people, take in every breath like it was your last, savour every bite of food, savour every shared smile, every kind word, live one day at a time to the fullest.

    One last thing, remember you are not alone friends.


  • I don't mind about update of oberin.
    I'm happy only oberin has here.

    From one of your friends, Hayate.

  • That´s the spirit Ariki. Keep on fighting and don´t give up (I know easier said than done). And don´t worry about updates etc. The show is still running smooth and well. Like the others said already we are a small but tight connected community who care for each other, so be sure we think of you.

    And for projects turning into things too big, I have the same currently on my heels. As some folks know I design a wargame atm and at points it seems like this beast is overwhelming me. But like you said there is a point of no return. And as long as you keep them running/try to complete them to a good end all is fine. And believe me, having your own business is the way to go. Dive right into work and you´ll see that things will work out, even if it takes time. 

    Giving up is for loosers, and as far as I know you, you´re not one of those folks.


  • Glad to hear you're making it through man. Sending you all the good vibes from across the big water. Congrats on the Fibre Optics stuff, and I hope that things continue to progress well.

  • Hm, I'm torn. On the one hand, I'm a little disapointed about the lack of updates. On the other hand, I live in NZ, and getting setup with optical fibers would be super neat. So I guess whatever you do it's a win-win for me tongue

    For what it's worth, I can totally relate on the self doubt thing, and starting stuff that never gets finished >.>
    Just know that we all love you. As long as you remember us, you are not alone ♡